(As promised, the birthday post!)

I can truly say that I was blessed beyond measure this birthday.  So, I thought I would write down the blessings (or at least some of them) so that I can look back and remember the way that my Heavenly Father cared for me on that day.

I’ll start with the day before my birthday.  I have this dear friend who has given me at least one rose from her garden every year for my birthday since I was about 10.  This year was no exception…but there were other gifts included.  One of them being some plain cup-cakes.  She left them plain (and included some frosting and sprinkles) so Ava could decorate them for my birthday.  What a good idea!  And Ava and I had such fun decorating them together.  That night after supper, Ava sang the birthday song to me (which was so adorable!) and we blew out candles.  It was good for me to have that time to celebrate just the three of us…hard, but good.

OK, now to my actual birthday.  I started the day off by waking up an hour later than planned.  My excuse was that both my children woke me up that night (which was unusual) and even though they both just wanted to be tucked back in (which was sweet), my sleep was interrupted, and when my alarm goes off, I’ll admit that any excuse will do 🙂  Anyway, so we all got ready and were only about 15 minutes behind “schedule”.  My plan was to stop and pick up coffee before dropping off the kids at my mom’s house, then head to the cemetery.  Josiah and I would always go out on a date for my birthday (and our dates usually included coffee), so I guess in a very weird way, I was planning a date.  I know it doesn’t make sense (believe me, I know), but it was something that I had stuck in my head.  So back to my morning, I looked at the clock and decided that I was going to have to forgo coffee and I’ll admit, I was sad about that.  I told myself that it was fine.  I told myself that it was a silly, sentimental idea anyway.  I told myself to just get over it and act my age…I mean, I really should be over being disappointed by things like this, right?  So, that’s what was running through my head as I was backing my van down the drive-way, when I looked up at our front porch and what was sitting there?  Some flowers, a card, and a balloon attached to…you guessed it, a warm, wonderful Starbucks.  I was so moved by that cup of coffee…the fact that God saw the “little” desire of my heart and He saw my disappointment and He provided that desire in a way that was a total surprise to me.  I’m pretty sure I teared up over that cup of coffee and all that it meant to me.  And as I was driving away (this was after several blessings the day before and numerous birthday text messages and e-mails), my heart just felt so unworthy of such love that was pouring down on me.  And God spoke to my heart and said “That’s the point Jess.  You don’t deserve such love…it is freely given.  Just accept and be thankful”.  Yes Lord, I know, but how will I repay such blessings?  And again, God spoke to my heart “Jess, that’s NOT the point.  Just be obedient to Me and I will use you to bless other’s just as I’m prompting them to bless you”.  Oh….how He LOVES us!

So, I dropped off the kids and headed to Josiah’s grave, Bible AND coffee in hand.  I needed to just talk and cry, and I cannot explain why I feel the urge to “talk” to Josiah at his grave, but I do and it is such a release for me.  I knew I needed to get that…out of the way I guess.  I am finding that I cry (or feel the urge to cry) so much more these days.  It’s usually not the all out sobbing on the floor kind of cry…just quiet, sad tears.  I did not feel like crying every day before (which may sound weird), but maybe it’s all just catching up to me now, because it’s daily and it’s not going away so I’m learning to be OK with that.  Anyway (sorry for all the rabbit trails), I talked, and cried, and read my Bible (which fed my soul as always), and prayed and that was it.  I left, ready to start the day.

About a week ago, when I was thinking about my birthday, I got it into my head that I just wanted to do something completely different and a little crazy (well, crazy for me anyway).  So, I made a plan.  After leaving the cemetery, I picked up my cousin and we headed to the mall.  Can you see anything different?

OK, before you start guessing about things I probably don’t want you to scrutinize to closely, I’ll just tell you.

It’s something that I’ve talked about doing for several years and Josiah always told me to go for it, but I always chickened out talked myself out of it.  I like it.  And it gives me a good story to tell people when they ask what I did for my birthday!  Plus, I figured I will probably always remember this birthday, so why not remember it with something permanent right?:)

After that excitement, I had lunch with my 2 ladies.  We had a lovely, girly time 🙂

The rest of my afternoon was pretty open.  The one thing I wanted to fit in was a date with my favorite girl in the whole world. So, since it was a beautiful day (and the blessing of that was not lost on me), Ava and I went swimming.  We had a ton of fun!  Ava LOVES water slides and there are couple at our pool that she can go on, so we had a blast with that!  Ava gets cold and starts turning blue pretty easily, so we didn’t stay too long.  Plus, she kept telling me that she wanted a snack (which told me that she was very hungry since she rarely asks for food), and I of course had not brought anything to eat.  So we left and got some french fries and orange juice (her idea) from McDonald’s and were happy as clams.  I love spending time with my girl!

Later, we had supper with my family and a few close friends.  My mom had made all of my favorite things and my dad grilled chicken (also my favorite!) since I had mentioned I was missing grilled food this summer (that was Josiah’s thing).  It was a beautiful night and I so enjoyed spending it with people that I love.

And, I was totally spoiled with gifts, and flowers, and yummy treats, and cards, and e-mails, and phone calls, and gift cards, and text messages and….I’m sure I’m forgetting something.  And then, the next day, some wonderful ladies from church treated me to lunch…I love girl time!  Plus I got to celebrate on Saturday with the Johnson’s and was spoiled again!

I truly felt blessed and loved on my birthday!  Thank you to all who were apart of it.  I am so humbled and so thankful for each one of you!  May God bless you in surprising ways 🙂