The kids and I went to the park this evening before supper. I was feeling tired and was lacking any motivation and the kids were full to overflowing with energy so I knew I needed to make a plan. I’m usually fine, but evenings can be difficult on random days. It’s a time when families come together…and well, ours is together ALL the time so nothing much changes at night. Sometimes that fact can make me in need of something different. Tonight…it was the park (with a quick little trip to starbucks on the way for a pick-me-up for mommy). It was a beautiful evening and we had such fun together. There were lots of Daddies at the park but I tried not to let that hurt get in the way of our time together. When we got in the car to go home I suddenly felt the urge to go to Josiah’s grave…so we did. The kids always make their own fun there and tonight was no exception. There is plenty of space to run and play and as much as it hurts, I love that they are ridiculously comfortable there because it is our normal. I also love how God always meets me in a special way there. Even though I didn’t verbalize a prayer…my heart was hurting and needing some kind of comfort. And my God did not fail me tonight. I’m not one to really look for “signs”, but when I looked over at the sunset tonight, I saw this:
I realize that this may seem silly to some and maybe a little far-fetched, but regardless of the method, God’s message hit the mark. I do not believe that seeing a heart-shaped cloud at that specific time was a coincidence. I do believe that God used that to tell me in a very unique way (don’t ya love that God is creative and unique?) that He loves me with an everlasting love and NOTHING can change that. And I love that He chose to show that to me in that place…my husband’s grave, a very real symbol of the human love that I no longer have. I am NEVER alone. I am His. He chose me. He will NEVER let me go. I am complete in Him. I am LOVED more than I can ever imagine. That is enough.
Beautiful Things 