Providence = The foreseeing care and guidance of God…
It’s been an interesting week and maybe I’ll get more into that later. But for now I thought I would write a post that has been in my head for about six months. I have written about this subject in a round-about way and have talked personally with several of you, but to some of you that have wondered and prayed, this is for you. This was never meant to be a secret, but certain parts are private and will remain within a select small group. Now that I have your curiosity, let’s talk…finances 🙂
I have had quite a few questions about this and I completely understand why. If I was on the outside looking in on a very young widow with two small children I would be concerned about how she would support her family too. In order to explain my situation in the degree of detail that I choose, let me tell you a story…a story of Providence.
About three years ago Josiah and I started talking about life insurance. It was a subject totally brought up by him and something that I see very clearly now that God laid on his heart. Josiah started doing research. We had some life insurance through his job but if something were to happen to him, he wanted to make sure that his family was provided for. That fall, we (and by we, I mean he) got serious about it. I on the other hand was six months pregnant and the LAST thing I was thinking about was death…I had LIFE growing in me after all. That’s why I’m thankful that God made my husband the practical planner that he was.
Because I was pregnant, we were not sure if my application would even be accepted, so we almost didn’t even try until after the baby was born. But again, providentially, we took the physical needed for the application and both of us were approved and we bought that life insurance. Within about six months of it being approved, Josiah was diagnosed with an aggressive and devastating cancer. As the months went on and our future became more clear, I started thinking about my options. How was I going to support my family alone? I had no college education. I had never worked full-time (outside the home anyway). What would I do? God blessed me with such peace that He would take care of me and provide for me and my children. I did not need to worry because He would make a way. Josiah and I had MANY things to discuss and I didn’t want him to worry about us so I didn’t bring up my thoughts for a while. But when I did, Josiah looked at me and with such peace in his eyes he told me that if everything went as he planned, I wouldn’t have to worry. I cannot tell you what comfort that brought him to know that even if he couldn’t be here, he could still provide for his family. Obviously, I hadn’t paid too much attention to the amounts on our life insurance policies. Not that it would have mattered because numbers really don’t make sense to me…they never have. I’m really more of a words kind of girl. Thank God I married a man who was actually good with numbers and took care of our finances.
Our plan had ALWAYS been that when/if God blessed us with children, that I would stay at home and raise them. So, we had that in mind when planning our life insurance policies. Because of the timing of everything surrounding when we bought the policies and Josiah’s diagnosis, Josiah’s policy was investigated thoroughly after his death and took some time to work through. But God provided in the mean time. (On a side note, it’s not a bad idea to have 10 years worth of records…just saying.)
Thank God that eventually, everything with Josiah’s policy payoff went through and if everything goes as planned (and I’m still trusting God even if it doesn’t), life will continue as “normal” around here. We are not rich but we are not poor either. I will be able to stay home and raise our kids just as we always planned. We also made the decision shortly before Josiah died, that we believed that homeschooling was God’s plan for our family. So, Lord willing, I will still be able to do that.
We were careful with our money and I am currently debt free and plan to stay that way. I am learning tons about how to take care of our finances…but I have much more to learn. God has been SO faithful in providing trustworthy advisors to help guide me along. I definitely couldn’t do this alone.
Thank you for your concerns and prayers. The hand of God and the love of my husband are written all over this story and that completely blesses my heart. Nothing in my life surprises God. He has a providential plan for each of us and it both encourages me and convicts me to listen and obey when He leads.
Beautiful Things 
PRAISE GOD!!!!! Josiah was a wise man!
Thank you so much for sharing this post, sister. I am a keeper at home by faith and conviction, not by finances. Early in the marriage it was a huge sacrifice, but the Lord has always blessed and provided. I have wonderful stories of the Lord miraculously providing our needs. I love hearing that you are sticking to your convictions in staying with your children – the Lord will bless you. He is the Father of the fatherless and has promises a righteous man’s children will never go hungry. He feeds the sparrows and fed His servant with ravens. You and your children will never, never, never be out of His care or His provision. Still praying…
Praise the Lord! He guides our steps even before we know where we are going! Your blog has been such a blessing to me. I love seeing how God works in his children’s lives.
Isn’t God great in giving you a husband who had a plan to take care of his family even after he went home to be with the Lord?!!! Many of us don’t want to discuss life insurance, funerals, or other things that we may consider to be “morbid and depressing” subjects. Then, when a life altering event such as death happens we are left to deal with all of those things alone. After my mom went home to be with the Lord, my husband and I sat down and have started going over funeral plannings and life insurance policies so that, God forbid, if anything happens to either one of us, the other one will be taken care of.
Jessica:
I am one of those people you mentioned who are looking from the outside. I was concern for you and the children. My prayers for you were your provision and your protection. My heart feels a lil more at peace about you and the kiddos after this post…but don’t worry 😉 I will still be praying for you because there are other parts of provision that do not involve money such as wisdom to parent your children alone,protection and safety. Thank you for letting us know.
Thank you for sharing and once again reminding us all that God sees the end from the beginning. I can identify with you a lot. My Jim was the number person around here, and we too felt convicted I was to stay home, no matter what, and homeschool the boys. And God has done just like he said he would. He made it possible for the last 5yrs. Praising God for being the Great Provider!!!
HUGs,
Thank you for sharing. I am a huge numbers person and with Ava being so near to my heart, I had wondered how God was providing. Plus, it’s exciting that you will be able to homeschool as well!!! I am so thankful that God provides for our needs!
God’s timing is amazing and His love and care for us is even more so. I’m so blessed by your story in God’s timing of everything. He is so good.
My husband, too, planned enough life insurance to keep me able to stay home and teach. I have a six-year-old, so I needed to be able to not work for at least 12 years. He would sometimes say I would be better off with him dead because of all the money I would get, and I always protested that I didn’t want the money, I wanted him. Maybe God was giving me a message and I should meditate on it. Since it was obviously God’s will to take Ken from the earth, I must be better off. I mean, I am in God’s will. Ken was given wisdom from God to provide for us. The only thing I lack is an end to this loneliness. But as far as money goes, there is plenty for the family. I only have 6 dependents out of my 8 children. I wish I could look forward with excitement to what will come in the next year or two. I can at least look forward with trust and peace. God will have to provide the peace.
God is so good! And what a show of love from your husband!
Hia blessings are so abundant…more than we can ask or think. I knew that you were going to be taken care off. I had peace about that from the Lord. He has always taken care of us as we did His will and I knew the same would be for you. My prayers have most often been about uplifting and sustaining you. I know my weaknesses so I tend to pray about the same types of things for you. I do pray for the children, too. Thanks for sharing. Continuing to pray…
Jessica,
Your faith and (trust) in God is showing through all of your sharing! Thank you for helping us see how God has worked in your lives. Josiah’s life and death is a picture of God’s love and grace. God’s grace is sufficient! You help us praise God and we are still praying!